Insert Drool Here

What could be better than the dynamic duo of peanut butter and Oreos? How about Oreos filled with peanut butter cookie dough? Sounds like a match made in foodie heaven. I was perusing the inter-webs and found this fat kid delight on Handle the Heat which is quickly turning into my recipe blog obsession of the moment. If I don’t attempt to create these circles of wonderfulness soon I will not be able to live with myself. I can’t wait to force those around me to enjoy these little bites of fat kid nirvana.

PB Cookie Dough Oreos

Photo Courtesy of Handle the Heat – check ’em out!

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Scandalous

Tonight marks a glorious night. My all time favorite prime time soap opera returns after what seems like LIFETIMES of repeats. If you are not watching Scandal on ABC you have not lived. It has everything you could possibly want in a show: action, politics, love stories, fierceness, and best of all the no nonsense Olivia Pope. Seriously, if I can be half as ballsy as Olivia when I grow up I will consider myself a great success. Also my television husband, Fitz, is not too shabby on the eyes either. Can you believe Tony Goldwyn aka Fitz is FIFTY THREE?? He’s clearly on the same aging track as Jennifer Aniston. #obsessed

Fitz and Liz     Romeo Fitz and Liv    Fitz

My musical husband, Justin Timberlake, is currently preparing to put on a KILLER show in Boston right now and I’m throwing myself a mini pity party for not buying tickets. I saw him on the Future Sex Love Sounds Tour wayyyyyy back in the day and my jaw was on the floor the entire show. Even if you aren’t into his music, you are guaranteed a phenomenal show with JT. Dancers, lights, graphics, moving stage pieces, and the man candy himself, JT.

JTGQ

On a semi-related note, JT and his bromance bff Jimmy Fallon would be great in their own improv / sketch comedy show. Those two together are guaranteed comedic gold.

Updates from the grown-up world include paying my student loans ON TIME for once! Usually I just constantly slide my bestie, Sallie Mae, a twenty every day week or so to keep her quiet. But due to some savvy finance skills luck, I was able to pay that lovely bill EARLY. I also moved to a brand spanking new cube location at work. This cube features a fluorescent light that can be TURNED OFF at my own discretion. I know you are all oohing and ahhing at home over that one. I also got the vanilla thunder (my car) detailed so it does not look as skanky on the inside as it does on the outside (thanks constant snow!).

This is short because I’m trying to learn how to make my blog look prettier. Because, you know, looks are everything in the blog world. If anyone has any tips on how to create a “pretty” blog drop me a line in the comment section!

Don’t Call Me A Millennial

There is nothing I LOATHE more in the world than someone calling me a millennial. A millennial is defined as someone who was born between 1982 and 2000. Give or take a few years depending on who is writing the article. The Today Show had many interviews, Time Magazine did a darling cover story called The Me Me Me Generation, and the world exploded with infographics about all of the millennials likes, dislikes, tendencies, and behavior patterns in 2013. The only thing that didn’t happen was giving millennials their own zoo exhibit.

Typical characteristics of millennials are that they are lazy, self centered, face deep in an iPhone, think they are smarter than anyone old enough to have only known vinyls, and expect the world to conform to their every whim. People have done studies on how millennials will change the business world forever, what impact they will have on the political fate of the world, and how they will change the face of retail for centuries to come. There’s a whole lotta pressure riding on millennials right now. Some people have even gone as far to make fall out shelters to hide from the impact this generation will make on society.

Now in an effort to not be biased, there are many people sticking up for millennials, like this article here. There is also one positive infographic for every negative infographic about this group. Some people have even gone as far as suggesting millennials may have some decent things to offer the world. But the general stigma is that if you’re a millennial, you’re a self-centered brat. Which is why I resent being called one.

My parents did not raise me in a world where every thing was catered to my needs. (Thanks Mom and Dad!) Many articles have been written stating that millennials have grown up getting a trophy, whether they win or lose, having rules bent to fit their needs, or were simply never told “No.” Well news flash world, me and many of my friends were told “No,” and never given a trophy when we lost pee-wee soccer. Just like the generation that walked uphill, both ways, in the snow to get to school, we too were expected to follow the rules. So I don’t expect my boss to turn my cube into a bouncy house, make my work hours fit with my sleeping patterns, or give me a gold star every time I blink. I fully expect to adapt, within reason, to the parameters of my job. What I do desire, is to learn from my superiors. Learn how to function in this business environment and learn how to be the best that I can possibly be so I can be successful within this current career.

I am not self centered. Do I have stretches where I feel like I have so much going on that I can’t possibly think beyond my own world? Absolutely, but who doesn’t? However, that doesn’t mean that, even in those moments, almost every decision I make I am not thinking about its affect on others. In fact my first thought when something is said or done is: what will other people think of this? I am also probably super nosey overly concerned with what is happening in my friends and acquaintances lives. There are some days where I realize that I have addressed so many non-self related issues that I haven’t even eaten a meal yet. Will I concede that there are plenty of people in the millennial group who have lost the ability to see that others do in fact exist in this world? Yes. But I think that holds true to every generation. I was raised, again by two rockstar parents, to consider other people. I’m even an only child and I still somehow miraculously manage to maintain the ability to recognize and acknowledge other beings.

I expect to get what I earn. If there is anything I fault my parents for, it’s teaching me that you get what you earn and you will be rewarded appropriately. Instilling a sense that things should be fair and awarded based off your performance and effort. It pains me to see people “handed” things that they did not earn. I work hard and I expect to be compensated accordingly. This “millennial sense of entitlement” irks me to no end. When I started applying for jobs, I did not go for the CEO positions. I applied for anything and everything at the entry-level. I am a firm believer in working your way to the top. So when you see that I was born in 1991 on my application, do not assume I am coming in to steal your position. I want to learn from you and find a way to earn my way to a superior role. But I am in no way immediately gunning for your job.

Yes, I’m tech savvy. Yes, I type faster than anyone you’ve seen before. Yes, I will probably never go anywhere without my phone. And yes, you betcha I am going to constantly want the latest and greatest tech gadget. But you know what? That’s life now. Eventually we will live in a world run by computers and gadgets. For goodness sake, we’ve already put phones in watches and eyeglasses. It’s only a matter of time before the robots come marching in. This doesn’t mean I’m disengaged or uninterested. It means I’m attempting so desperately to stay current and connected. Do I want to check my Facebook and Twitter at work? Yes, I do. But I’m not checking it to like my friend’s latest selfie. More news stories hit Twitter before any news station can broadcast it. I found out about the Boston bombing via my friend’s retweet from her friend at BC, before the local news station had even realized what was going on.

I know I’ve been ranting for what seems like hours but I promise this is my last point. Political involvement. I am the first person to admit that I am no where near as politically involved as I should be. I have my opinions, like every great millennial does, but I lack the desire to take the time to learn enough to do anything about it. But my outlook on political involvement isn’t skewed because of the laziness I feel towards political research. It’s the sheer hopelessness I feel about our current situation. When the stock market crashed, I watched the grown-ups in my life lose a lot of assets. I listened to my parents talk about the affect this would have on my college funds, their retirement funds, and the future of their finances. I watched friends’ parents get laid off and struggle to keep what jobs they had. I then watched friends get shipped off to places where it was it doubtful they’d return anytime soon. I started learn about things like welfare. I signed up for student loans. Attempted to get financing. Applied for hundreds of jobs to only get a handful of interviews. I’ve spent the majority of my adult life in debt and plan to spend the next 10 years fighting it off. To me I feel a sense of helplessness when it comes to changing the political realm. In my mind it’s such a giant mess that I can’t even begin to find a starting point. Now this doesn’t mean I’ve said forget it and stuck my head in the sand. I’ve turned to others actively involved in politics for advice to start my own involvement. Just give me a hot minute to wrap my head around everything and I promise I’ll get involved.

The moral of this post is this: don’t assume that just because I was born in 1991 that I am going to be a millennial monster. I’m on Team Nurture. My parents raised me to be quite well rounded. Or maybe that’s the millennial narcissist in me? Either way, at least give me a chance to prove to you that I will not only work my booty off but also absorb any life / business lessons you can share with me.

#TotesTuesday

I feel like every great blog has one day of the week where the post topic will always be the same, like WIAW: What I Ate Wednesday or Flashback Friday. In the interest of eliminating one day of the week where I have to scour the depths of my mind for some tidbit of hopefully entertaining content, I am dedicating Tuesday to be #TotesTuesday.

As many of my real life acquaintances know, I am a FIEND for swagtastic cheesy shortened words. Cray = crazy, jel-jel = jealous, adorbs = adorable, perf = perfect, tevs = whatevs / whatever; the list could go on for quite a while. So from this point forward I declare every Tuesday on this blog to be #TotesTuesday. (totes standing for totally) Each Tuesday I will share a list of the things I’m currently perplexed / intrigued / obsessed with.

And here we go….

1. #Totes Obsessed with this Treadmill

Trail Treadmill

Please ignore my pitiful pace – I was dying “cooling down”

So this is a treadmill I knew my gym had for a while. But I have been hibernating in my apartment complex’s gym for the past few months in a valiant effort to learn how to run. Yesterday I decided to pull the trigger and go back to the judgement zone  Gold’s Gym. I just wasn’t motivated enough to get off my own ass and go to my apartment gym anymore. Anyways, I finally got to try this fancy new Life Fitness treadmill. You can select a variety of different screen views. There are trail runs, like the above photo, through a variety of real life trails. These trail runs even have educational fun facts to keep you occupado while you huff and puff and run the house down. You can pick the 5K lap view to track progress, play a game, sync it to your phone, or good ole’ fashioned television! Probably the best parts of this treadmill are that you can hide your current time / distance / calories AND count down backwards from your end distance goal. This is absolutely key for me because running is essentially one giant Inception head game for me.

2. #Totes Going to Buy This Tory Bag

Tory Burch

The Tory Burch ‘Mini Ella’ Nylon Tote in Black is going to be my first not-from-china-town handbag purchase ever. I’m not gonna lie, it’s going to be odd not doing my usual haggling bit. The last time I acquired my Flouis Fuitton bag it was like partaking in a leg of the Amazing Race. I had to follow a team of 3 non English speaking, walkie talkie wearing, humans up 15 blocks of China Town sidewalk only to be confronted with a laminated take out menu of “couture” options. I selected #9 and another walkie talkie human magically appeared, from what I can only assume was an act of Floo powder, with my selection. Then I had to hassle the price down from $100 to $50 only to hand the “sales clerk” $60 and ask for change. It was an experience to say the least. So I can’t wait to own a REAL bag, especially this one that I’ve been drooling over for months.

BTW readers – Flouis Fuitton is a super exclusive couture line.

#NAHT

It’s what I called my fake “patent leather” black Louis Vuitton bowler bag. I cherished it for so long. Thank you Flouis bag for more than fulfilling your purse duty.

3. #Totes Drooling over this Peanut Butter

Child's Play PB

http://www.pbpeanutbutter.com/childs-play-peanut-butter-spread-12oz.html

So a fellow co-worker who runs a blog called Running on Peanut Butter blogged about this beauty today: Child’s Play Peanut Butter. It’s made by a company called Pacific Beach Peanut Butter. They must be foodie angels sent from heaven to have created this masterpiece. Child’s Play Peanut Butter is peanut butter with chunks of M&Ms swirled in. Yes, that’s right, peanut butter with the M&Ms already in it! Not only does this save me SO MUCH TIME, because my two favs are chocolate and peanut butter, but I feel like I can #totes justify this as healthier than eating a bag of peanut butter M&Ms. Seriously contemplating ordering a jar of this crack awesomeness.

4. #Totes Jammin to “Bad Intentions” 

Bad Intentions

If you don’t know who Niykee Heaton is I cannot talk to you. I was creeping Twitterland one night and saw some rando favorite her “Bad Intentions” tweet. Naturally I gave it a listen as I am a music fiend. It was INSTANT love. I have been listening to this song every car ride, gym sesh, and shower. (yes I play music while showering – sorry neighbors!) I also took a gander at her other songs on SoundCloud and she makes acoustic versions of rap songs. As if I didn’t want to BFFs with her enough already, she takes my alter ego, 2Chainz, and turns it into an absolute FIRE acoustic song. She also has an ADORABLE chunky puppy. I’m not usually into the acoustic sounding stuff but I am HOOKED on Niykee’s music right now. Her songs are all free to download so you should all #totes get on that action and download a few jams.

Well there’s the inaugural #TotesTuesday post. I promise that by next Tuesday this list will be insanely different because that’s just how I roll. Let me know some of your #TotesTuesday things!

When I Grow Up I Want To Be Beyoncé (#obvs)

Mondays are usually not too much of a struggle for me. My worst day of the week is usually Thursday. Thursday is just endless and I swear some hunger games level habitat control always occurs. Anyways, usually on Monday it takes me about 1 hour to snap out of the weekend mode and hop into work mode. But today was just meh. It wasn’t a bad day, wasn’t an outstanding day, just a day. So when days are meh naturally my mind wanders and creates elaborate schemes for myself. Today’s wander-sesh began with “What is Beyoncé doing right now?” I cannot tell you why this was my first thought – but it was, so just go with it. I was just sitting in cube land thinking “What’s Queen B up to?” Thus I have arrived at today’s post: the various diva-isms I wish to channel from Queen Bey herself.

1. Classy Glitter

Every single performance Beyoncé does incorporates more classy glitter than I ever thought existed. What is classy glitter you ask? Well just take a quick meander through a Beyoncé glitter Google image search for some examples. What is not classy glitter is anything Ke$ha. Although do not get me wrong, there are certainly times and places where Ke$ha glitter is needed and accepted. If you are so lucky to be my Facebook friend, you know that I have an affinity for classy glitter – especially with my nails. I want so desperately to find a career where it is completely appropriate to rock some serious classy glitter. (please hold your stripper / exotic dancer jokes ’til the end of the post)

Glitter       Beyonce
classy glitter

Kesha

Ke$ha glitter – reserved for select occasions

2. Jay-Z

Let me immediately clarify that Jay-Z is not even on my top 25 list of male celebrities I’d go for – that’s another post for another day. Except if you are Jay-Z reading this right now, you are absolutely #1 and you can tweet at me to set up a dinner date.

I am merely commenting on the fantastic relationship Jay and Bey appear to have. I mean Jay-Z went vegan for TWENTY TWO whole days for Beyoncé. That is some SERIOUS love. I’d need at least 4 golden retriever puppies, an endless supply of vegan fro-yo that actually tastes good, and a Range Rover to even contemplate going vegan. Plus every picture I see of them they look adorbs and they’ve done some pretty on point duets (Bonnie and Clyde anybody?).

Jay and B            Jay and B

3. Sasha Fierce

This is my favorite aspect of Beyonce’s demeanor and I probably should have put it first on the list. But the glitter was very distracting and I don’t feel like re-ordering this post. Beyoncé’s alter ego, Sasha Fierce, embodies her “I won’t take nuthin from nobody” mentality.

Beyoncé gets what she wants. She doesn’t beg and plead for it, she earns it. She works for what she wants and people respect her more as a musician, mother, and celebrity because of it.

She has made some tough business decisions, like firing her father from being her manager and taking total creative control over her career. Imagine how hard it would be to work with your parents let alone have to fire them? Helllooo awkward family dinners for the rest of your life.

She is fiercely private about her personal life. She has done an amazing job keeping herself and her family out of the press. She’s created a barrier between her personal life and public life. Therefore she is seen as an artist and not as some tartlet who was flopping around on Bieber’s lap last weekend.

She practices what she preaches. Many of her songs focus around empowering females to be strong and independent. While I may jam out to Run The World (Girls) because it’s catchy, there’s some pretty powerful messaging going on in that song.

I consider myself a relatively outgoing person. (I can hear the chuckles from my friends and family at that comment already) But I think we all could benefit from adding a little sasha fierce to our lives. Be who you wanna be and do what you wanna do. Channel the sasha fierce.

Sasha Fierce

This post was wicked deep for a second post. I apologize. But this Beyoncé introspection is really all I got going on for this Monday. I had a terrible run at the gym but what else is new.

With that I leave you with my all time favorite Queen Bey jam – Diva.
May your tomorrow be just a little bit more #sashafierce.